How To Throw a Low Brow, Low Carb, Texas-style Labor Day Party On a Budget

Throwing a low carb Labor Day Party on a budget is easier than you think. Summer meat sales and bountiful vegetable harvests provide many opportunities to get perfect low carb foods at a fraction of regular prices. With a little ingenuity and imagination, Susie T. Gibbs helps us stay true to our low carb roots while navigating through a National Meat Holiday such as Labor Day, on a budget and with Texas flare to boot.

Labor Day Marks More Than the End of Summer

Like millions of Americans, you probably think Labor Day is a celebration observing the official end to summer. You look forward to that last camping trip, the last lake adventure, the final summer grill-out, and the last three day weekend you’ll experience for a grueling two and a half months,  until Thanksgiving rolls around.

But to a Southerner, especially for Texan Southerners, Labor Day represents so much more than one last-ditch party. Labor Day is the line in the Gulf Coast beach sand DFSWs (Delicate Flowers of Southern Womanhood) the world ’round use to guide them in all things pertaining to fashion.

Simply put, rule #1 of the DFSW Primer clearly states:

“No white slacks or shoes after Labor Day!”

(Oh, and Daddy, put that straw hat away, it’s time to drag out the felt Stetson until next Easter. Sorry! Them’s the rules!)

 

 Don’t get me wrong. It’s not like fashion etiquette rules the day. And looking past the fact that every mattress store in America is having a Labor Day Blowout Sale, you can clearly see that Labor Day is party central here at the ol’ homestead:   low carb food out the ying-yang and cold, low carb libations with varying alcohol content.

The Red Solo Cups (RSC) , stacked high and deep, stand ready right beside the black Sharpie you’ll use to personalize your very own RSC.  Devil-may-care low carbers fill their cups with ice cold Michelob Ultra or Miller Lite,  or another favorite low carb libation. There might even be a pot of low carb punch to spike, along with endless pitchers of low carb sweet tea for those tea-totallers.  But carbs add up quickly, especially with “liquid nutrition” and I’m just stubborn enough to want to chew my carbs instead of drink ‘em.

 

 

Memories Of Labor Days Past

Labor Day used to be such a carefree holiday, before I grew up and learned about things like budgets and bank balances and things that go bump in the night, keeping me Sleepless-in-Houston. Growing up, Labor Day meant a last family trip to the Frio River. Most summers were spent with Mama and us girls living out of tents on a jut of land perched high above the Frio, across from old Seven Bluff,  along the old ConCan “Highway”.

Now, that old road isn’t a thoroughfare most would recognize as a “highway”. It’s an old caliche road about five miles long and so narrow you almost need to know someone in the Biblical sense to pass them. It winds around in the Frio River bottom, kicking up a trail of white dust as it meanders through two low-water crossings, pecan orchards galore, and miles of classic Hill Country scenery including an old stagecoach depot from the 1800’s.

Dad and the boys would drive up on the weekends to party and play in the crystal waters of the coldest clear-water river in the Texas Hill Country. (The Frio was cold, make no mistake, with the name to prove it.) And party we did, especially on Labor Day, that last big 3-day weekend before school commenced once more!

We floated the river (that’s Texan for strappin’ a cooler full of beer and soda to a giant inner tube and tyin’ individual tubes together to make an inner tube island filled with people and cold libations).  We donned bathin’ suits, sunglasses and hats, and joined hundreds of other like-minded Texans in the pursuit of doin’- nothin’- much, in a real slow way. We’d float for hours from one low water crossing to the next, swappin’ tall tales and partyin’ the entire time.

And oh my, the barbeque the boys made still makes my mouth water. They’d roast huge hunks of meat, ribs and sausage.  Cold Big Red was always involved. In fact, cold Big Red and Mama’s Potato Salad probably contributed 40 lbs of fat, packed on my ginormous Southern behonkus to this very day. You’ve heard the idea “first on, last off”? Well, in my low carb trek to health, I still haven’t gotten to the last “Labor Day 40,” as I affectionately call the relics of bygone Labor Days still hangin’ onto my hiney.

How About A Low Brow Low Carb Labor Day, Honey? And Make it a White Out!

We’re plannin’ a big Labor Day to-do this year. It’s a final blow-out before I head off to the hospital for reconstruction surgery on “the girls” in early September. Friends, it’s gonna be a “white out party.” A white out party is where everyone including the sock monkey boys wears white; white shoes, white pants and white shirts. Not only will everyone be wearin’ white, but the men will have a last hurrah in their straw hats as we wave farewell to summer and prepare for another month of 100°+ temps before the first cold snap cools us down a bit.

Activities such as badminton, horseshoes, washer pitchin’, darts and pool will abound, but food will be the center of attention. In between rounds of horseshoes and tossing washers, that is. Oh, and there will be a budget! I love tightwad parties. We will be doing a Low Brow, Low Carb Labor Day. In fact, one of my friends suggested raiding the cabinet to build a menu around existing pantry items put by for a rainy day. You wouldn’t believe some of the gold I uncovered hidden in the dark recesses and nooks!

I raided the old 4th of July decorations, pulled out the cheapy white tablecloth I scored on clearance at Linens n’ Things, raided the red and blue bandannas, restored the tiny flags to their Mason jar, and dug deep to find the ropes of mylar stars. We will use the bandanas as napkins and the rest will be  table decorations and patio ornaments. We even have our favorite Red Solo Cup lights ready.

(For those of you not familiar with Red Solo Cup lights, that’s a trick we Texans use to gussy-up a string of white LED Christmas lights in the absence of true patio lights. We punch little holes in the ends of small Red Solo Cups with an eyelet punch and poke an LED through the hole making little LED lamp shades. Oh so festive and oh so Frio-River Rat-Chic with a capital C.)

Although the fun remains the same, some things have changed from Labor Days past. Mom and Dad are gone home now and three new generations have sprung up in their place. The food has totally morphed into low carb comfort foods that linger on the lips but bypass the hips. Potato salad became fauxtato salad. The baked beans morphed into three bean marinated salad. Coleslaw is still a low carb family favorite – we’ve never been much into sweet slaw. And the Junior League Texas Sheath Cake, well, (sob,hic), it’s only a fond memory of days gone by. However, we do love that Lemon Buttermilk Ice Cream, and that’s one hundred percent low carb.

From a food perspective, today’s Labor Day 2.0 is even better than in years past. It’s sleeker. It’s swifter. It owns white shorts and tank tops. It’s low carb, mostly-Paleo deliciousness with heavenly proteins and good healthy fats along with bushels of the freshest vegetables and luscious salads the summer has to offer.  And it’s still a ton of down-home fun.

 

Labor Day on a Shoe String Budget!

I start shopping a few weeks in advance, craftily taking advantage of summer meat sales and BOGO (Buy One Get One) specials. Loss leaders determine where I shop each day. For those of you who live out in the woods, a loss leader is a marketing ploy used by grocery stores to get your hot body and hotter wallet inside their front door. It seems they increase the likelihood you will overspend in their store if they actually get you to their store in the first place.

The special or loss leader “deal” is an enticing offer (often meat), sold at a steep discount or “loss” to the store. It generally requires you purchase an additional quantity of groceries to take advantage of the incredible special, or that you use a loyalty card so they can sell your shopping info to the highest  bidder. Carefully selecting the additional items  and using coupons to correlate with those purchases sweetens the deal.

Remember, coupons for condiments are close to being a DFSWs best friend (as long as Sissy and Ida Mae don’t know you’re using coupons, of course.) When you can redeem them for double or triple the coupon value, that’s even better! In fact, follow the SCC rule.

If it isn’t on SALE, CLEARANCE, or COUPONED, forget it! Put it back.

(That’s what I tell our sock monkey boys in the unfortunate event they go shopping with me.)

In Texas, we’re lucky enough to score great loss leader sales on  brisket, pork spare ribs, sometimes even pork shoulder. Last year, we found brisket on sale  at just $0.99/lb; here’s hoping we see similar sales this year. I’ve already squirrelled away a bit of meat in the bottomless chest freezer in the garage:

Loss Leader Meat Deals

• Chicken Quarters – 10 pounds for $0.55/lb
• Bone-in Chicken Breasts – 6lbs for $0.99/lb
• Fresh Pork Picnic (that’s the bottom of the butt or shoulder) – 10 pounds for $0.99/lb
• Pork Spareribs for $1.29/lb.

I have faith we will see sausage, wieners and ground beef on sale, too and will be ready to jump on them faster than a duck on a June bug! And don’t forget: There’s nothin’ wrong with pullin’ all the meat off the bones and stacking it high on a platter! People  take smaller portions this way, as opposed to serving a gigantic breast, plus pulled pork, plus ribs, plus sausage for every single person. You’ll have less waste on the plates, too.  Just let ‘em take what they can actually eat.

But, But, I Don’t Know How To Barbeque!

I’m listening.  I understand.

Not everyone has a barbeque pit or a smoker, or even a grill. Still, I want you to be able to enjoy a semblance of Labor Day, Texas-style. I’m going to share my tried and true low and slow un-barbeque pork shoulder recipe and the low carb quick barbeque sauce that sets my family’s lips to smacking. You can set the pork butt or fresh picnic cooking overnight, low and slow. It will be done before the guests arrive and you won’t have to worry about tending the fire while tending to the serious business of partyin’ with your family and friends.

Make up a batch of Fluffy Chix Cook quick barbeque sauce and have it ready, too! Although it’s semi-homemade, your couponing will help defray cost and will be a time-saving blessing as you prepare for the party. It’s so simple my oldest sock monkey, Buddy, could make it! He just learned to use measuring spoons.

 

How To Get the Neighbors to Help Out Without Noticing!

Oh hey, here’s another tip for cuttin’ Labor Day food costs: Invent a fun game. Have a food contest! Invite people to bring their favorite tried and true recipe or house specialty,  or have a best-dessert contest, complete with prizes from the dollar store or a trophy you find at a thrift shop. Make it quirky. Use your imagination for the name of the contest and get creative and fun with those rules! That way it isn’t quite like announcing to the neighbors that you’re too much of a tightwad to provide all of the food for the party. That’ll be our little secret.

Enjoy your Labor Day in low brow, low carb Texas-style.  Have a great time, but don’t forget: “liquid nutrition” adds up fast! Try to remember to pace yourself. Alternate carbacious alcoholic libations with iced tea or sparkling water with a squeeze of lime. Drink responsibly and don’t mess with Texas.

And please. Lift a Red Solo Cup to us folks laboring away at CarbSmart Magazine – the leader in low carb recipes and low carb information on the internet.

 

Fluffy Chix Cook Un-Barbequed Pulled Pork

(Note – Nope it isn’t Texas Barbeque, but it’s a whole lot easier and doesn’t require years of hard-won knowledge of hardwood and the intricacies of slow-smoking meats. It’s the best un-barbeque you’ll ever eat! Feel free to use a larger cut of meat to feed more people. Simply use the method below to estimate cooking time.)

Yield – 8 – 10 Servings

Prep Time – 30 Minutes

Cooking Time – 4-6 Hours (About 1 to 1-1/4 hours per pound at 225°)

Resting Time – 20 Minutes

Ingredients

• 3-4 lb. Pork Shoulder Roast, raw trimmed weight
• Salt
• 2 Tbsp. Olive Oil
• 1/4 c. Coarse Dijon Mustard
• 4-6 Tbsp. Barbeque Rub
• 2 tsp. Black Pepper, coarse grind
• 2 Tbsp. Dried Parsley
• 1 Tbsp. Kosher Salt
• 1 Recipe Low Carb Barbeque Sauce (2 Tbsp. per serving)

Instructions

Wash and dry meat. Trim all but about 1/8” of fat off pork shoulder. Score meat about 1-inch apart to form a large diamond pattern. Sprinkle with salt.

Heat sauté pan over medium high heat, add the olive oil,  and brown meat on all sides. Pour excess olive oil from the pan and return meat to the pan. Massage the mustard into the meat being sure to get down in between the diamonds to the pork flesh beneath. Sprinkle liberally with a quality sugar-free barbeque rub along with coarse ground black pepper, dried parsley flakes, and Kosher salt.

Cover pan tightly with aluminum foil and roast in a pre-heated 225° oven for 4-6 hours. You may also use an indirect cooking method with your propane grill or smoker/barbeque pit. Use the lowest setting and monitor the temperature. Cooking this tough cut of meat too quickly (any temp above 225°-250°) will cause you to lose too much liquid from the meat. The meat will end up dry and cottony in texture. That’s a hangin’ offense in Texas.

Give it the fork test. If the meat easily twists and “pulls” when a 2-prong barbeque fork is inserted, it’s done. If not, seal it back up and put it back to cook a little longer. I find that 1 to 1-1/4 hours per pound of meat  at 225° works as a good rule-of-thumb.

Remove meat to a platter. Cover with the aluminum foil and allow meat to rest on the platter for a minimum of 20 minutes.

While the pork rests, deglaze the roasting pan:  Pour off and reserve the liquid in the pan.  Heat the roasting pan over a high burner.  Deglaze pan with a little water or broth, scraping the bottom of the pan to remove any burnt-on browned bits left behind. Add those browned bits and liquid to the pan juices you drained. Use this insanely flavorful liquid to build a barbeque sauce, or save it to use in soups, stews and veggies. I sometimes let it cool and freeze it for later use. That way, I always have meat drippings on hand for building barbeque sauce.

You may either continue with the recipe at this point, or you may allow the roast to cool completely, then portion out and freeze in vacuum bags or refrigerate until the next day. It works best to pull the pork while it’s still warm from the initial cooking. Discard any gristle or sinew. We mix the outside fat into the barbeque, but discard some of the interior fat that has a lot of stringy membrane attached to it. That portion has a yukky texture.

To reheat the pork:  add a bit of those pan juices you saved and a splash of barbeque sauce to a baking pan. Add the pork and cover tightly with aluminum foil. Place in the oven on low heat and allow it to come to serving temperature. Serve with barbeque sauce on the side or if you’re feeling wild, coat the pork in the barbeque sauce.

Serve with coleslaw or three bean marinated salad and fauxtato salad for near-authentic Texas sides. Spicy Texas Coleslaw and Oven-Fried Green Tomatoes are always a hit! Treat yourself to a splurge of diet Big Red and go to town. You can even make a pan of low carb focaccia bread as a substitute for the traditional slices of white bread served with Texas barbeque. We’ve also come to love Bacon Cheddar Ranch Crack Bread!

 

Fluffy Chix Cook Barbeque Rub

(Note: This recipe may be doubled or tripled and stored for later use. Fluffy Chix recommends freezing your spices to help maintain freshness.)

Yield – About 19 Tbsp or 1cup – 3Tbsp

Prep Time – 10 Minutes

Difficulty – Must know how to use measuring spoons.

Ingredients

• 1/4c. Erythritol/XylitolBlend, granular
• 1 pinch Stevia (Sweet Leaf or NuNaturals)
• 1 tsp. Blackstrap Molasses
• 2 Tbsp. Granulated Garlic Powder
• 1-1/2 Tbsp. Onion Powder
• 1 tsp. Celery Salt
• 1 Tbsp. Smoked Paprika (Optional)
• 2 Tbsp. Mustard, dried
• 2 Tbsp. Paprika
• 2 Tbsp. Parsley, dried
• 1 Tbsp. Thyme Leaves, dried
• 1-1/2 Tbsp. Crushed Red Pepper Flakes
• 2 Tbsp. Black Pepper, medium grind

 

Instructions

In a coffee grinder dedicated to spices, or with a mortar and pestle, blend molasses with erythritol/xylitol and Stevia until it resembles brown sugar. Add the brown sweetener to the other spices and stir well to evenly combine.

Store barbeque rub in an airtight jar.  Large empty spice jars work great for this purpose! Shake well before each use.

To use, spread liberally over meat. Be sure to salt the meat in addition to using this salt-free rub.  Use  Fluffy Chix Barbeque Rub on Texas Brisket, too, and for heaven’s sake, don’t forget about using it to flavor the barbeque sauce!

Remember, coupons and dollar stores are your condiment buying tools!

Nutritional Info Per 1 Tbsp Spice Rub – 17.4 Cals, .6g Fat, 5.5g Carbs, .98g Fiber, 2.5g Sugar Alcohols (Erythritol, Xylitol, plus Stevia), .79g Protein, 2.02g Net Carbs

 

Fluffy Chix Cook Quick Barbeque Sauce

(Note: This is a semi-homemade alternative to a lengthier barbeque sauce recipe. Sauce recipe can be doubled or tripled.)

Yield – 2-1/2 Cups of Finished Sauce

Prep Time – 10 Minutes

Cook Time – 30 Minutes

Ingredients

• 3 Tbsp. Walden Farms BBQ Sauce(or some other low carb prepared sauce)
• 4 Tbsp. No Sugar Ketchup(or homemade low carb ketchup such as Dana’s Ketchup)
• 1 Tbsp. Yellow Mustard(like French’s or the store brand)
• 2 Tbsp. Worcestershire Sauce
• 2 Tbsp. Pickapeppa Sauce (or 2 Tbsp. Worcestershire Sauce)
• 1 tsp. Sambal Oelek*
• 3 Tbsp. Apple Cider Vinegar (Bragg’s Unfiltered preferred)
• 1-2 tsp. Blackstrap Molasses
• 1 tsp. Fiberfit (or 1 drop EZSweetzor other liquid sucralose) or 1 tsp. Erythritol/Xylitol/Stevia blend)
• 1 Tbsp. Fluffy Chix Cooks Barbeque Spice Rub
• 1 Tbsp. Chili Powder
• 1 tsp Granulated Garlic
• 1/4 tsp. Cayenne Pepper, ground
• 1 Tbsp. Paprika
• 1 tsp. Black Pepper
• 1/2 tsp. Kosher Salt
• 8 oz. Tomato Sauce
• 1/2 Onion, do not chop
• 1/2 Lemon
• 1/2 c. Meat Drippings (from the cooked pork roast)
• Xanthan Gum (Optional – you most likely will not need to thicken the sauce)

Instructions -

Combine all ingredients in medium sauce pan, adding the half onion and half-lemon just as they are. Bring to simmer and allow to cook for about 30-45 minutes. Remove from heat. Remove lemon and squeeze the juice into the sauce. Remove onion. Stir and adjust salt and pepper if necessary. Serve with barbeque or spread over burgers. If necessary, thicken using your favorite thickener. It shouldn’t be necessary.

* Sambal Oelek is an Asian chili paste; look for it in the International aisle of a good big grocery store.  If you can’t find it, sriracha hot sauce is all over the place these days (the most popular has a rooster on the label), and substitutes nicely.

Nutritional Info:  Makes 2 1/2 cups, or 2o servings of 2 tablespoons, each with: 28 Calories; 1g Fat; 1g Protein; 5g Carbohydrate; 1g Dietary Fiber; 4 g usable carb.  Your Managing Editor ran the numbers on this, using her own KC Barbecue Sauce recipe from The Low Carb Barbecue Book in place of Walden’s, and her own ketchup recipe (’cause they were in my data base.)  Split the difference on the blackstrap molasses, analyzing for 1 1/2 teaspoons.  Used “hot sauce” stats for the sambal oelek, since sambal oelek is, indeed, hot sauce.  MasterCook does not include stats for “meat drippings” or “pan juices,” and they’ll vary from roast to roast anyway, so I fudged it with a half-cup of concentrated broth, plus a tablespoon of fat. 

 

Susie Snack Hunger Buster #2

Serves - 1

• 1 oz. Mozzarella String Cheese
• 1/2 oz. Crispy Walnuts
• 1/4 small Granny Smith Apple, with peel

Eat slowly and savor the flavor of tart apple with crisp walnuts and creamy cheese. Guaranteed to bust the 4 o’clock Mean-Hungries until supper time!

Nutritional Info - 178 Cals,13.8g Fat, 6.4g Carbs, 1.6g Fiber, 9.1g Protein, 4.8g Net Carbs